The Story of Us

*This was actually written for my wedding website last spring, but I liked it and want to share it again!

About Rachel




Rachel was born and raised in Council Bluffs, Iowa. She attended Abraham Lincoln High School (Go Lynx!) and participated in band, flags, tennis, swimming and yearbook. As the time came to figure out where to go for college, she declared she wanted to go somewhere far enough away she "couldn't go home every weekend, but could easily make the drive if she wanted." After narrowing it down, she chose Bradley University inPeoria, Illinois. After testing out many majors, she settled with a Bachelor of Science in Sociology and one in Communication: Advertising. With full intentions on moving to Colorado after she graduated, Rachel inevitably accepted a job in Peoria, and "just never left."

In 2007, Rachel bought a house in Creve Coeur, IL. It was a small house that needed a lot of cosmetic changes, but Rachel was excited to get to work. Five years later, there is still work to be done (but isn't there always!), but she has made it into a comfortable home. She lives there with her fluffy, white dog Ellie and chubby cat Teeka.

Rachel is currently working at Belcan Engineering, where she is the Recruiting and HR Administrator. She assist the recruiters with - oh heck, she keeps the place running by planning, organizing and knowing who is where, when.

Some of Rachel's favorite things include cake, chocolate, a good glass of red wine, quiet Sunday mornings, reading, shopping, laughing with friends and rearranging rooms (she wanted to be an Interior Designer for thislong).

About Scott



Scott was born and raised in Teutopolis, Illinois. He attended Teutopolis High School (Go Wooden Shoes!) and participated in band, track & field and cross country. Scott followed in the footsteps of his father and went south to Southern Illinois University inCarbondale, Illinois. He started out with the intention to go into medicine, but somewhere along the way he could not ignore his true calling, and switched over to Television. With a personality like Scott's, it is surprising to find that he does not like to be in front of the camera, but rather the one in charge of the camera! Less than one week after graduating, Scott took a job in Peoria, Illinois and settled in with his good friend Josie on a quiet little street on the east bluff.

Scott currently works at WMBD 31, where he is a Photojournalist. He travels across the viewing area, capturing the news with his camera. He has done stories on everything from the latest homicide to feel good stories about good Samaritans to local sports coverage. He always has a good story to tell when he gets home from work (though sometimes he leaves out the gory details)!

Some of Scott's favorite things include reading, running, bacon, eating meat, eating other foods, telling stories, a good glass of whiskey, watching Da Bears, laughing with friends and family, and being the center of attention - well...maybe not...but he is one of the loudest people you'll meet!

How We Met



Once upon a time...

For the last 21 years in Peoria, the Peoria Jaycees have held Beerfest. This immense event lasts for two days and features hundreds of beers from all over the world for visitors to taste. You can only imagine how may volunteers it takes to put that event on! (This year's event is April 19 & 20 and is going to be AWESOME if you might happen to be in the area.)

Rachel became a member of the Peoria Jaycees after meeting some new friends at an event and telling them she wanted to get involved and meet new people. They sucked her happily into their world and she started attending/volunteering for various events. When Beerfest came up, she offered her assistance as a ticket seller and spent an evening meeting new people.

Scott got involved with the Peoria Jaycees after his coworker Mary asked him if he'd like to join them in St Patrick's Day parade. He hit it off with everyone there (in spite of knocking someone's tooth out - by accident!) and soon was participating in various activities. When Beerfest rolled around, he was more than excited to offer his help and ended up working security for the event.

But Scott and Rachel didn't meet that night at Beerfest...or at least don't recall. A few weeks later, the Beerfest committee threw a Volunteer Appreciation party for anyone who helped. Rachel showed up with her friends and Scott with his. Still being new to the group, Rachel strolled around mingling with the few she knew. She had met Mary on various occasions, so stopped to say hello. Soon other people were joining in on the conversation and wouldn't you know it, Scott was one of them. Mary casually introduced them and everyone continued chatting. (Side note...even though the party was for "Beerfest" and alcohol was served, neither Rachel nor Scott consumed that fateful evening.)

After some time, Scott said he had to leave...he had a date that night. The group teased Scott about "who this girl was" and "where he was taking her." He didn't have a plan yet, he said. After a short time, he said his goodbyes and left.

About 20 minutes later Scott returned. She had ditched him, so he came back to the party.

He and Rachel continued talking in the same circle of people. They both laughed a lot that night. As the volunteer party was winding down, a group decided to go to "The Basketcase," a local karaoke bar. Scott said he was meeting his friends from work there and Rachel and her group of friends decided to tag along. The group of them had a good time at the bar, drinking, singing and making fun of people. Finally it was time to go. They all piled out around the same time and said goodbye and everyone parted ways.

The next morning Scott began calling around for Rachel's number. He called Mary, who called Steph, who told Nadine, who called Val......Word got back to Rachel that "someone" was asking for her number and she got a little nervous and excited. She hoped it was Scott who wanted that number.

Finally, two days later, Scott called Rachel and since then, they have not gone more than 24 hours without talking.

I Can See Cleary Now...

Sometimes you miss something for so long that you build it up to be this great and amazing thing that is missing from your life. And then sometimes you get it back, or part of it back, for maybe just a moment, and you realize its not as good as you remember.

I feel like a lot of times, failed relationships fall into this category. Doesn't matter who broke up with who or how long its been, but sometimes we tend to remember only the good parts and build those up. But then you run into your ex and remember why you broke up...that yes, the good was good, but there was a reason for the break up.

And sometimes it comes as a moment of clarity. God bless moments of clarity. Sometimes, I'm just driving down the street and I suddenly realize something...maybe its that I'm finally over him, or that I'm actually happy with what I've got. But it just comes out of the blue. And its like suddenly the sun comes shinning through the clouds and I can breath better.

And sometimes, that moment of clarity is just what to make for dinner.

Lessons Learned

They say you learn something from every relationship you're in.

I don't know who "they" is, but I believe that. If you can't take away something learned from a relationship, then you really did just waste the past few weeks/months/years of your life.

Heading back into the dating world, I started thinking about what exactly I had learned from my previous relationships. Some, I had a hard time coming up with something and others I could have made a list, but here's what I've taken away from them:

High School Boyfriend: Trust Your Gut

My first real boyfriend. In my naivety, I believed it was true love and we'd be together a long time (maybe not forever, I mean I was a smart girl who'd be leaving for college). Anyway, we had a good relationship, and as the summer wore to a close, I could tell something was going amiss. But that was all in my head. Right? We went to a going away party towards the end of the summer and HSbf disappeared for a while. I asked around, and they said he was downstairs. I ignored it for a while, but something started to bug me so I went down to check, he was down there with the host's sister. It seemed innocent enough, they were just sitting there talking. But still, it didn't feel right. So I asked him to come up...both of them actually...to return to the party upstairs. He kind of blew me off. I returned to my friends upstairs but couldn't shake the uneasy feeling. I later was informed that he was messing around with the girl in the basement. When I confronted him he didn't deny it. Said we wouldn't have made it much longer anyway since we were going different directions for school. I was heartbroken, but lesson learned. If something doesn't feel right, it probably isn't.

Bad Boy #1: Boys are Messy

Hey I didn't say they'd all be deep lessons. And this is a lesson I'd learn over and over and over again. And that as much as you ask (or bitch) about the filth, in the end its who they are, and you can rarely change that.

Bad Boy #2: Take Heart In Your Best Friend's Opinion

Really this was another "trust your gut" lesson, but emotions can get in the way and outwit your gut.

Stupid emotions.

Anyway, its not that I've learned that my Best Friend has to adore my Boyfriend, but her opinion should count. She knows you as well as you know you, and sometimes better...cuz she doesn't have stupid emotions running around clouding things up. If she says something is weird, take a moment to step back and look at it objectively. She wants you to be happy, she's not trying to sabotage your love life. Often times, she can see things you can't. In my case, she saw things I didn't want to acknowledge, and pointed them out so as to spare my feelings in the long run. I didn't listen though. And guess what? She was right. And I got hurt. But she was there to pick up the pieces and help me keep moving. So now I weigh her opinion a little heavier.


Bad Boy #3: Having and Keeping a Job is about More than Just Getting Up and Going To It

Yeah, I went through a Bad Boy phase. They even all looked alike. Looking back, its rather disturbing.

Not only did I go through a bad boy phase, there were also a number of waiters (I was one too and it was a revolving door of new people...great place to meet guys! Or so I thought). I was a server too, so I don't dis the job. What I don't understand is being complacent with the job. It was never a job I intended to keep for the rest of my life. It was to help me get through school and then give me a little extra fun money. But I had higher aspirations...get a job with regular hours and benefits and a steady paycheck.

I dated what I refer to as 'career servers.' Some of them were great people, but not long term relationship material. It is not just a job at that point, its a mindset. And what I learned was that it meant they didn't want to grow up and take responsibility for themselves...they were the most important people in their lives and thinking of others first was not their strong point.

From the collection of relationships, I've also learned to that I have to be me. Yes, there are compromises to be made, but not about my core beliefs and morals.

Sometimes, its fun to learn new lessons, sometimes it unbelievably difficult. But at the end of the day, I know its ok because they've all gotten me to where I am today, and all these lessons will be stored and used for the right relationship.

Dork.

It used to be an insult to be called a dork, and depending on the context, it still can be. But that being said, I've learned to embrace the dork that I am and confidently roll with it.

I was a tall, lanky, smart girl in school who played in the band and loved science and math. It was the perfect makings for a dork. I wasn't taunted or made fun of in school (at least to my face), I was comfortable in my dorkiness and wasn't really bothered by it...I hadn't embraced it yet, but I knew that I wasn't a bad person and I had plenty of friends. It wasn't until sometime in college that I embraced the fact that I was a dork, I was just a little off from 'normal' and that was okay.

It hit me the other day that in the whole dating process while I'm looking for a tall, good looking guy who's smart, confident, stable and funny, I'm much more attracted to someone when they let it show they too are just a little dorky. While in the fairy tale world, I want the perfect guy, the truth is that would make me uber self-conscious. I would be concerned that I would say the wrong thing or make a fool out of myself. The truth is, when a guy shows his dorky side, I find it endearing.

But there is a line...its not all that 'fine'....its just there...maybe a sliding scale...

Yes, I find it endearing when guys have a bit of a dork inside them, but I'm not looking for all dork. No need to be obsessed with Star Trek or Worlds of Warcraft. I'm not looking for conversations to continually focused around our solar system, the beginning of time or how awesome computers are and how much he knows about them.

But if he lets it slip that his favorite show is MythBusters because its fascinating, or that he can recall random facts that can only be used in trivia games, I find that sexy.

I'll admit it... I ♥ Dorks.

What I've Learned

Since I joined the dating world again recently, there are a few things I've learned. The basic principles never change, but if you're out of the loop for a while, you see some things with fresh eyes when you get back.

Boys & Cars

Call me old fashioned, but I find something yummy about a guy who knows his way around a car. He doesn't necessarily have to be able to take apart an engine and put it back together in working order, but change the oil, fix a belt...you know the basics. But this is what I've learned...my generation of guys don't know how to do any of these things. Or if they do know how to work on cars, they have no other education and very few teeth (I'm making a very general statement there, so I apologize if you, my reader, can work on cars AND read).

What are fathers teaching their sons now a days? Isn't that how fathers and sons are supposed to bond? By working on the family car together? I know, there I go again with my old fashioned-ness Its disappointing that the majority of guys in my generation can barely find the dipstick. Even I know where the coolant goes and what it sounds like if a belt is going bad. Thanks Dad.

Photo Op

Whether we want to admit it or not, we all judge people (just a little) on their appearance. Dating sites are no different. The photo you choose for your online profile can be the difference between attracting someone of your caliber, or attracting someone who...well someone you don't want to attract.

One thing I've noticed though is the type of photos that men are posting (though I've noticed women do to on like Facebook and such...). Self portraits. Honestly, I found it a little off putting at first. Don't you have to be vain to do that? Doesn't that show that you don't have any friends to take pictures of you? Really? You need to capture yourself on film at that exact moment and no one else is around? Hm. I've seen some sites where people have like 15+ picture that they took themselves. Excessive! Right?

And then I started putting together my profile. I started looking through my collection of photos. Funny. I have lots of photos...but I'm the one taking the pictures of other people. And I'm often the only one with a camera. So I've got one with my mom...but I look fat...I've got one with my ex...but that's not appropriate for a dating site...I've got one someone snapped in which I've got a funny face. But where are the cute ones? The ones that highlight my best features and where the sun hits my hair just perfectly? Well I'm not a model, so those don't exist. But, maybe I can get close if I try a couple myself.

So I did. And got one that I actually like. And when I put it on my profile, I got a bunch of new hits! Woo.

The other photos I continuously run across have to do with cars (ironically, ones they don't know a thing about). An oldie but a goodie is the classic, "standing in front of my car." Many times the cars are not that impressive. And I really don't care what you drive (well I prefer its not a junker...but beyond that...). And generally, they just look like a big dork in front of them. The new style photo I've seen popping up combines the previous two...a self portrait in the car...what looks like is taken from the steering wheel while driving. WTF? Really? And I don't understand why it is popping up all over guys' profiles. Not just one or two...but like 50% of them! I don't get it.

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And this is what I've learned recently. I have a feeling there will be more related posts as I actually start dating. The dating world is crazy and odd and I feel it is now my duty to share it.